wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Randomize