thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
handjob tips. give me some.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
