he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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