operation harelip BJ is a go
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Pants are for mortals
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize