theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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