would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
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