she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I just threw up on my dentist
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
