I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I have fence marks all over my body
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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