Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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