i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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