Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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