I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize
