wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
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