i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize