I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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