Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
