Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
