So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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