we have officially lost it.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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