And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
