I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
