she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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