I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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