even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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