Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
