you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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