Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Randomize
