Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
