if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
as a side note pls kill me
The adults are the big ones right?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
