Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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