My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
