ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
