it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
