Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Randomize
