Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
