On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
