Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Can vaginas get frostbite?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Randomize
