just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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