she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
