out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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