I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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