And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
