i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize