And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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