gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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