AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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