Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
