All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
You are a genius and a whore.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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