She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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