Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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